|
|
Is
this all just a Fantasy?
"Slavery is
not a condition of the body. No chains can make a free man servile. It is the
condition of the mind and the heart. In subjecting oneself to the ultimate
servitude, accepting one's place as a slave in society, a person accepts
bondage over freedom, and complacency over action."
Frederick Douglas
These
words were used to denounce the institution of slavery in the pre-civil war
US, but they strike a definite chord in the hearts and minds of many modern
purveyors and proponents of the BDSM community.
'Human bondage' is certainly a valid condition in the minds of the persons involved in this way of life and it is part and parcel of that which makes it so real and rewarding.
There has been, in recent times, a preponderance of
writing that decries certain aspects of the lifestyle and labels them
ludicrous. The authors and "experts" (some are senior members of
the life and respected in their communities), claim that since nothing we do
is "real" - since you may not "really" own
"slave", and since the "roles" we 'assume' are not
'real' - all that can remain is an 'elaborate fantasy game'. Such claims are
given bite through their references back to the Webster's accepted
definition, which refers only to the example of the despicable and
indefensible institution of enforced slavery that was eradicated through the
implementation of the 18th amendment to our constitution.
The argument that slavery does not and cannot exist
within the context of a BDSM relationship is a good and valid one when one
seeks to support it by use of such rhetoric. Its legal institution does not
exist in our part of the world, and its characteristics were defined in
years past and by societies long dead. The revulsion that many feel towards
the word and its stereotypical connotations is an honest reaction, and the
result of the socialization and the raising of man's consciousness in
righteous indignation against such a repressive social dynamic. One must
realize, however, that definitions of words can change and evolve over time;
language is not a static thing, and the characteristics that were used to
define an experience that was once inherently evil may no longer be employed
in an uncompromising manner.
The gay/lesbian movements of the late 20th century decided that the definition that society imposes upon those of us who live alternative lifestyles is not a concrete signpost for all times. These groups defined for all time the inalienable right of man to label himself as an individual rather than a stereotype. They recreated in the minds of 'Joe and Jane Public' the reality of their world and reduced the stigmatization of their cause and themselves through education about, and elucidation of, their realities.
When they question our definitions of reality, the
leaders of our community undermine the best of the things that the cyber age
has brought to us. They deny us the ability to tell the world what we are,
and perhaps more importantly, what we are not.
We are not the monsters of their worst beliefs and the stuff of their most valid prejudices. The leaders and members of our community that denigrate what is to many of us the very essence of our lives (our definitions and therefore our way of life) reduce our cause and our lives to the fairy tale status of madmen plagued with fantasies of grandeur. They do us, as a community, a great disservice.
Modern slavery in the contextual BDSM community of the
western world is not what the dictionary defines 'slavery', and rightfully
so - for in that definition lies the roots of pain which plague mankind even
today in the farthest reaches of the world.
Why, then, should we use such a despised term when
there are viable alternatives that are less political and culturally
painful? Why not use 'submissive', 'thrall', or 'chattel'? What it
comes down to is this:
although the institution of slavery is not defined (in
our alternative society) by those characteristics which comprise instances
of enforced servitude, it does exist. When one denies this central fact
of the lifestyle, one denies the very existence of such people -
slaves - among us.
Slaves owned in our context are able to make the critical
decision that defines the differences between the two institutions. 'Our'
slaves choose their state. They may choose their master or mistresses and
may (in many instances) leave their self-imposed condition of property.
Does this ability to choose indicate that they are not, then,˜really" slaves?
No… they are, as they define themselves, AND as they
are defined within the community, without property, without vote in the
decision-making processes and without recourse (except to leave) when the
going is not to their liking.
This state of voluntary servitude is not without
precedent.
Indentured slaves and servants were, and are, the people who decide to allow and encourage their active enslavement in return for the ability to attain a certain goal, or for simple remuneration. They were the first slaves in America; the ones who offered their services for certain periods of time in a desire to receive something they considered equally valuable (usually transport to the 'new world' or learning a trade). I am familiar with this institution; my relatives used this method to establish the family in this country.
Are modern slaves (as defined in the BDSM context)
receiving equal value for their efforts? One must suppose so, as they
continue in this life.
Were the indentured slaves beaten for misdeeds? Did they
suffer because of their decision? One may suppose that they did, as they did
not have any rights beyond those that a slave would have; and at times,
demanded punishment for errors and mistake. Why did they not leave when they
arrived in this country? In many instances, the indentured simply took pride
in keeping their word. Prosecution by law was another incentive, although
the new country was so vast, the new communities so scattered and
communication so primitive, that discovery and reprisal for "cutting
loose" was an unlikely event.
They may have also been learning a trade, or working for the
betterment of a wife or husband - or for money that might eventually bring a
family across the vast waters.
They had reasons to stay, and yes, they were (by
definition) slaves.
The definition of slavery in America beyond the days of
colonialist expansion becomes one of a harsher reality; one of chains and
bondage, one which would have made the dark ages proud in the savagery of
its enforcement, the less than human conditions of work and food... no
escape, no consensuality. The attributes developed to reflect the politics
of that age.
We are redefining our lives and our realities to
conform to something that is older than the purveyors of this new language
of sexual freedom. We represent many in the unfolding multitudes of sexual
revolutionists whom the cyber age has introduced to what has been seen as a
dark, closely held secret in the midst of our society.
There are those among us who argue that the people who are
submissives, fetishists, or role players call themselves slaves when there
is no way they can be slaves. They argue that the inherent latitude allowed
in their lives, or the virtual nature of their BDSM experiences and
interaction precludes such a state.
Yes, there are people who define themselves more
loosely than is comfortable for the benefit of their own ego. Some who claim
the name "slave" within the real life and the cyber communities
should definitely be rebuked for demeaning the term and cheapening the
effort it takes to be someone this strong of heart, servile of demeanor, and
sincere in desire. At the same time, it must be emphasized that we cannot
allow ourselves to believe that these people in today's BDSM society are
less than that which is discernible to the most casual observer. Yes, the
word 'slave' may be offensive to some; yes, others may turn from our
alternative lifestyle in disgust, and yes, it is certainly true that some
will demean the term and lessen the impact through their misuse and abuse of
the phrase, but that in no way changes the essence of what we are, of what
we can choose to be.
Do not deny this definition to the deserving in a
community that is layered with a many-faceted conglomeration of fetishists, sado-masochists, perverts, and ego-maniacs.
A person who has made their needs reality through a combination of hard effort and sacrifice does not desire to be redefined by someone who does not know them, by someone who has no conception of the devotion that binds them to their owner, or by someone who is simply denying that the semantics of one's life can be the realities of one's day.
|
|
Website & Graphics by my girl (subtleigh), with a special thanks to Tessa of Australia for the BDSM Debunking the Myths logo. Also, visit our online shop: www.kjcanes.com |